Review: Revenge of the Sith

See it. It's really, really good. Not like Episodes I and II that were total crap and had hardly anything to do with the original trilogy. This one is the bomb. Even though you know what happens at the end, it's still very suspenseful. Seeing Darth Vader put on the helmet for the first time (and take his first infamous breath) is worth the 28-year wait. Too bad his final line almost ruins the entire film.

However, the very last line of dialogue is saved for Anthony Daniels (C-3PO) who also has the first line in the original Star Wars. The whole film is filled with nice touches like that.

Now that the film cycle is complete, is childhood over for an entire generation of X's and Y's? Do we now all put our Star Wars figures and matching sheets on Ebay and move on?

40 Weeks

Yes, Mrs. Ethos is with child (hopefully mine). If this is news to you, perhaps you should call more often. And I'm sorrry you had to read about it on a blog page. That's incredibly lame.

This impending miracle will surely be a limitless source of cute stories, embarassing parenting missteps and humorous visits from zany social workers. But you will read none of that here. OK, never say never. But here's my guarantee:

This blog will remain 68.29% baby-free.

If ever you are dissatisfied with the level of non-baby material being posted, please reprimand me in the comments area. However, pot-shots at my wife or child will not be tolerated. You may instead make fun of my growing "sympathy belly."

If you're concerned that my soon-to-be fatherhood will limit my free time to hang out, remember that between my work schedule and my penchant for hookers, you probably haven't seen much of me in the last five years anyway. So I'll still be totally available to hang out -- just as soon as I get the diaper genie emptied, the stroller fixed and the baby fed and put down for a nap.

You probably have many other questions, so to save us all some time, below is the baby FAQ section:

When is she due?
-What is she a goddamn library book or something? Do I get charged a nickel for everyday she's late? OK, December 8 (2005).

How is she feeling?
-Hell if I know. Every time we start talking, she runs off to pee or falls asleep.

Was this planned?
-None of your fucking business. And Yes.

Are you going to find out if it's a boy or a girl?
-I certainly hope so. I know I have zero experience with babies, but that much I should be able to figure out.

Do you have names picked out yet?
-Yes. But my wife hasn't agreed to them yet.

Will your wife get the Down Syndrome screening?
-I'm pretty sure she doesn't have Down Syndrome. But I guess it wouldn't hurt to be doubly sure.

Will you raise it to be a Phillies fan or an Orioles fan?
-Orioles. Cmon, the kid's gonna have enough problems already.

LO3B

Looking at a baseball box score you can virtually reconstruct the entire game. It's a thing of beauty, I think. The information is dense and cryptic. But if you know what you're looking at, you see exactly who came up big and who let the team down.

There are the runs batted in, the homeruns, the extra base hits, the sacrifices and the 2-out RBI, just to name a few badges of honor. Then they indicate who made errors, who grounded into a double play and who left men in scoring position with two outs. These are the dubious honors. I'd like to propose one more. This one I think should be pointed out as it is even more egregious: runners left at third base with less than two outs.

When a runner is at third with less than two men out, simply putting the ball in play will usually score the run. A fly ball to the outfield. A well placed ground-ball. A hit. All will score the run easiliy. Striking out or popping up in this situation is a complete embarassment and should be indicated in the box score.

If you're going to single out batters who are unable to place a clutch hit to score a runner from second base with two outs, surely we can point out hitters who can't even move a runner 90 feet with no outs or only one out.

Let the tallying begin!